Sushiesque

Richard B. "Rico" Modica Way attacked by zombies

The ever-mutating alley in Central Square, on Tuesday:

Billions of Dead Things

It both baffling and flattering to see that the last year's long-overdue anti-zombie activism has been taken up by an entirely new group of protesters. It is especially heartening to see robots unite with humans to take a stand against this culture of death.

Despite being out of town for the duration of the event, I contributed some tidbits to the Zombie March 2007 post-post-mortem at Bostonist. Quotes from the community organizers of the undead came from a short email Q&A with the wonderful Halfwaytohuman folks, reproduced here without edits or corrections of any sort:

1. what did last year's lurching accomplish? what do you and you undead hordes hope to accomplish this saturday?

Somerville Community Access Television provides safe space for zombies, marginalizes stateless mariners

Duly forwarded to C.R.A.N.I.U.M. representatives:

From: christina.l********@gmail.com>
To: christine.e****@gmail.com
Date: Oct 26, 2006 3:22 PM
Subject: Underage zombies

You probably got this already, but I reckoned I'd best be on the safe side.

Brains,
C.

---------- Forwarded message ----------

> To: s**************@yahoogroups.com
> From: jaimes.m*****@gmail.com
> Date: Thu, 26 Oct 2006 02:00:37 -0000
> Subject: [somartscouncil] Live Zombie Show at Somerville Community Access TV
>
> ******For Immediate Release*******
>
> Zombies of America will be making a stop at Somerville Community Access Televison this Halloween with a live call in show to address issues related to being a zombie like: What brains are best to eat? Where do I go to get a date? What do I do if my neighbor is a zombie-is it contagious?
> We will answer all the questions and more, please feel free to call in during our show on Halloween.

Revelations

On my kitchen table, Thursday evening:

A promotional postcard for Gospel of the Living Dead: George Romero's Visions of Hell on Earth includes a blurb from the author of The Zombie Survival Guide (which Brayden gave me a couple birthdays ago), and also an endorsement from a philosophy professor who recommends the book to "any fan of the undead whose brain has not yet been eaten." Kim Paffenroth's study, published by Baptist-affiliated Baylor University Press of Waco, Texas,

proves that Romero's films, like apocalyptic literature or Dante's Commedia, go beyond the surface experience of repulsion to probe deeper questions of human nature and purpose, often giving a chilling and darkly humorous critique of modern, secular America.

Human rights activists

Representatives of C.R.A.N.I.U.M. (Citizens Raging Against Nefarious, Inhuman, Undead Monsters) present at Zombie March 2006

Westboro Baptist Pirate

Billy Puffins, C.R.A.N.I.U.M. Spokesperson
As seen in the Dig:

Well, me and my companions here are property owners from Cambridge and Somerville. We are downright concerned about zombies moving in. It just drops the property values. What’s gonna happen to my children’s education when their teachers are teaching to zombies? Tell ya what—if you go out to Revere, you’ll see zombies have already come in and ruined the place. On the Blue Line, every third seat has a zombie in it.

Saturday of the Living Dead

Dramatis personæ: the Zombies

Purple Kimono Zombie
You will be... geisha!

Not pictured:
Zombies Dancing To Michael Jackson's "Thriller"
Catullus_5: "...it's like riding a bike. An undead breakdancing bike."

OED takes zombie threat seriously

Part XII of our educational series on zombies.

The June 2005 updates to the Oxford English Dictionary include new entries for the terms zombied, zombification, zombified, and zombify. The OED cites examples from such publications as Fangoria: "The aftermath of a meteorite shower zombifies most of the community."

If _____, then the zombies have already won

This is part XI of an occasional series on zombies and zombie theory.

Earlier this summer we heard reports that a horde of hipster-zombies had attacked some gamer-knights who were practicing their swordplay in a park in Montreal but we dismissed it as an isolated, Canadian incident.

After yesterday's zombie flash mob attack on San Francisco, we have come to realize that the zombie invasion is ongoing, possibly escalating North American crisis. Even here in Boston we may not be safe. The zombies have internet access. God help us.

(Illustration from Jason De Fillippo. Thanks to Garrett and Collene for leading me to this information. It may save lives yet.)

Zombies End Jesus' Reign

Part X in a series on zombies and zombie-related issues.

"The huge numbers of people viewing Mel Gibson's 'The Passion' movie show that there is a lot of interest in Jesus," begins the latest email update from Chick.com, which, despite the url, is not pornography but the official web site of Jack T. Chick, creator of such unflinchingly literal tracts as Allah Had No Son, Why Is Mary Crying? and Dark Dungeons. (Synopses: Muslims are going to hell, Catholics are going to hell, and gamers are going to hell, respectively. Overheard at the Harvard Square Tealuxe last week: "More atheists like his tracts than Christians.") Chick and other tract-producing evangelical folk have gotten plenty of mileage out of the The Passion of the Christ, as evidenced by the bright orange soda-colored trifold pamphlet that Jews For Jesus gave my room mate:

If you were an innocent bystander walking near the Empire State Building and saw a huge icicle heading Mel's way, would you be pierced for him?

How big a fan are you? [...]

Well, someone was pierced for Mel. In fact, someone was pierced for all of us, to bring us out of a precarious predicament (deadly situation).

Which, for me, provokes a mental image of Jesus getting an unsightly facial piercing just to impress me. (Jesus: just be Yourself, okay?)

We are alone and constantly battling for our lives

Part IX in an ongoing series.

Tonight someone found this site through a search for "irrational fear of zombies". To that person, and anyone else who performs such a search, I would like to say: FEAR OF ZOMBIES IS NEVER IRRATIONAL.

I once dated a fellow whose default mental activity was considering whether his current location—a dorm, a house, a mall, a yurt—was defensible against a sudden zombie attack. Fear of zombies is so not-irrational that there's even a weblog for it: TRAPPED BY UNDEAD, NEED HELP. (Thanks to Armand for giving me a heads up.) It provides links to survival guides, relevant news items, and irrelevant movie trailers ("This looks awesome. Why are we locked in this hell!!!").